Monday, August 25, 2008

Liberation

I went to my 10 year high school reunion this weekend.
It was oddly liberating.
It sounds cliche, but I finally realized how far I've come once I looked at where I've been.
High school wasn't a bad time for me.
I don't remember being persecuted or snubbed.
I laughed, cried, had friends and enemies, good times and bad. It was a pretty normal experience I'd say.
But, I was self absorbed and insecure. Teenagers are so full of drama. Everything is life or death.

There are parts of me that are the same.
My sense of humor, Loving to read, Loving history, art and poetry. I'm still a dreamer.

Then there is the stuff that changed.
I know who and what I am, and I'm not going to apologize for it.
I know whose opinion matters and whose doesn't.
I rarely take that which isn't meant personally, personally.
I don't judge other people's choices. There's no "right" way to live your life.
I have a more practical side that has developed over the years. The side that likes my job and works hard at it. The side that figures out how to deal with mortgages and car payments. The dreamer is still there, but she had to make room.

I talked to a lot of people at the reunion. Some I was friends with in high school, some I wasn't. It was fun to hear about the paths they've taken and seeing what their spark of possibilities has turned into.
It's liberating to realize that everything good and bad about me, was most likely true for them too. So few teenagers are really comfortable in their own skin.
We can talk now and be friendly in way that never would have worked in high school.
I don't know if I'll stay in touch with people any closer than I did before the reunion, but it was good to see them.

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